Do you want the good news or the bad news?

Duncan calls me, he's the boss man when it comes to AquaSkipper UK.
'Hi Dave, do you want the good news or the bad news?'

Oh dear, I hate that question. I always go for the bad news.
'Bad news, please.'

'Well, the people organising the Morocco competition forgot to book the flights.'
'What?!'
'They forgot to book the flights.'
'Please tell me there is some good news.'
'There is. You won the competition, you're the face of AquaSkipper!'

And so it was. I, Dave, had been Skipping along for all of three weeks and my little video diaries had shown enough improvement to tell Duncan that I was serious about this whole thing. A shame about Morocco, but at some point the promo video for the 'Skipper will come about, hopefully in a sunny location, with myself at the helm of the 'bouncy bike' or 'pogo stick.' It has earned many names since I started trying to describe the thing, but after a bit of thought and of course the compulsory 'closeness' needed to give a solid object a name, I've decided to call it, somewhat predictably considering my recent Australian history, 'Skippy.'

Word had gotten out that Skippy and I had a challenge up our sleeves, and HTV Wales paid the Cefn Hengoed pool a visit today. Chris Perry, the reporter, wasn't going to do a piece without having his own go on the AquaSkipper, which led to the piece on the night's 6pm news being called 'A Sinking Feeling.' Thank goodness I'd finally gotten the hang of it, there I was bouncing all over the place as Chris spoke, people all over Wales (not to mention the compulsory rows of Cefn Hengoed pupils at the window) staring wide eyed and shaking their heads in amused disbelief. 'I knew it,' they said to each other, 'I told you he was mad.'

And mad I felt, when pushed by Chris for a comfirmation of an endurance challenge on the Skipper. Even mentioning crossing the English Channel makes me question my own sanity, and the resulting story certainly homed in on that particular venture. But I have to think to myself, would crossing the Channel on Skippy honestly be harder than skateboarding across Australia? Different kettle of fish, the sea, but why not swap the rolling hills of eastern Australia for the rolling waves of the Channel? Why not? I've been called mad many times before, and it really doesn't hurt anyone. I'm going to have another session or two in the Cefn Hengoed pool, and then take Skippy back outside. 23 metres is no longer enough. It's time for Open Water.

(See the HTV report on www.bouncefree.org.uk)

The clock is ticking

Session three began with all the promise of the end of session two. Pushed off, nice and high, pump pump pump, yeah! Then I did it again! Yeah! Got it! Then I tried four times in a row and didn't get past halfway. 'What the heck am I doing wrong Danny?'

Danny Loo, stood at the side with video camera in hand, shrugged his shoulders. 'Not sure mate.' Danny had been with me during session one at Bray Lake. We're never going to talk about what happened there again. It was that bad. This bloke, record-breaking skateboarder, reckons he can AquaSkip across the Channel. 'Fair enough,' Danny had said (or at least he'd said something similar to that), he'd been with me for pretty much the entire BoardFree extravaganza, and he knew that sheer bloody-mindedness would probably get me through. Until Bray Lake. That first push off. 'Why are you calling this BounceFree?' they asked, 'try SinkFree Dave, it's more appropriate.'

'You just wait and see,' I said, gulping. 'You just wait and see.'

And Danny could see the progress. Now he was gulping. Well, at least for the first two goes. Then I lost the rhythym and floundered about for a little while, and he was able to be smug again. So I got him on it. This was his first go, he'd been too much of a wussy that first time with the cold water all around. Now, in the safety and comfort of an indoor swimming pool, Danny was ready to give it his all. 'If I make it further than Dave did on his first go I'll be happy,' he said. And he did. He pumped a bit. He got about 4 metres, which is 6 metres to Danny because he's small. And I was happy for him, because it's not easy to be that small and excel at any sport.

Cefn Hengoed Leisure Centre is tagged on to the side of the local school, and at lunchtime for about 15 minutes the blinds at the side of the pool were lifted and about 30 faces crammed up against the glass to see what was happening in the pool. They applauded when I skipped the entire length of the pool, and either laughed or banged the glass when I disappeared awkwardly underneath the water after forgetting about the bouncing rythym, which admittedly I often did when I drew up alongside the windows and got taken by a rush of blood to the head, which forced me to wave like a madman at the young, interested faces. And it was when I did this with two hands that I usually fell off.

But the session, as it wore on, was becoming a true success. The pool. at 23 metres, had me beaten last week, but this time round it was a restriction. the 'Skipper doesn't have the smallest turning circle so when I made it to the end I whipped around as a BMX rider would do when skidding to a stop, and sunk. This time, gracefully. For I was a length of the pool champion.

But this session had an altogether bigger aim. This Sunday, much to my chagrin, I am missing a get-together in a lake near London. The purpose of this meeting is for random people of all ilks to take on the challenge and bounce it off for the ultimate accolade, to be 'The Face of AquaSkipper!' The prize, a week long holiday in Morocco, where the AquaSkipper promo video will be filmed. So, because I am otherwise engaged on said weekend event, the video footage from this session was being sent to AquaSkipper UK headquarters, as my entry into the competition, so thank goodness I was getting the hang of it.

All I can say is, woo hoo! The feeling of bouncing along on the 'Skipper filled me with extreme joy. Improvement in anything is so satisfying, and having been a complete dimwit at AquaSkipping in the previous two sessions I was delighted to have finally found 'the knack.'

Watch this space for news about Morocco. Three weeks into my new career, am I going to be accepted as the face of AquaSkipper? I find out early next week.

PS. Just for the record, I love Danny. Just as a friend, but I love him. I don't mean to cause offence when I take the mickey out of him, I just do it because...well, it makes him laugh. And there's nothing like seeing his little round face grinning from ear to ear. It's almost like giving a baby a toy. Sheer excitement! He's my best mate, and he'd think something was wrong if I just said 'well done mate, you did awesome.' He's look at me sideways waiting for the punchline, and when it didn't come he'd walk away and I'd never see him ever again. Probably because he got stuck in a pothole and couldn't get out, but that's not the point...

Skipping along...

So, imagine. You're in a bit too deep for your own good, can't back out now, and there's an audience. A large audience, all with school uniforms on. And more intimidatingly, they're all pressed up against the window, so you feel like you're in a zoo.

If there was ever a feeding time for BounceFree, this was it.

The kind staff at Cefn Hengoed Leisure Centre, not far from the Swansea centre, agreed to support my efforts at mastering the AquaSkipper and gave me a couple of hours in their pool today. This was session 2. I've really got to make some ground.

Wayne, Ash and Mark the lifeguards were on hand to have a giggle at me as time and time again I splashed headfirst into the water, having managed a measily pump or two before the AquaSkipper, which doesn't have a name yet, sunk. After half an hour or launching and sinking, then climbing out of the water and doing the same again, I was getting tired. 'Why don't you guys have a go? It would be good for me to see this thing from a different perspective,' I said to them. So they went to get changed and I stood on the side for a while, frustrated at my inability to understand what it was that I needed to do. I was well into my second hour of my career as an AquaSkipper rider, and had made little progress from my first launch. I couldn't work out what I was doing wrong, how I needed to coordinate my body after a good launch. There was barely time for me to repeat my name when I was stood on the thing, how was I supposed to learn this?

The lifeguards took it in turns to have a go. From the off Wayne looked the best. After twenty minutes or so he was bobbing along four or five times, slowly descending into the water but finding the rhythym nevertheless. 'Oh dear,' I thought to myself, 'I've come in here with world record training on my lips but this chap is better than me already.' I am more than overly competitive, if my cat beat me down the stairs I'd have a sulk, and it niggled at me a little bit that I wasn't progressing as fast as lifeguard Wayne. It wasn't his fault! His success just highlighted my weakness. I had two choices. Give up, or sort it out.

So I opted to sort it out. Each time Wayne hopped over the water like a sprightly little lamb, I studied his technique. He was travelling no more than 10 metres but in that distance he bounced up and down at least 9 or 10 times. He looked like he was riding a horse. That’s it! I had been concentrating so much on trying to find the right combination of movement between my legs and my arms that I’d completely neglected one option. When the legs pump, push with the arms at the same time. The whole body moving as one, pushing down to create the forward motion with the hydrofoils and then using the inertia to take some weight off, allowing the AquaSkipper to rise up for the next pump. The necessity of a good fast launch was already obvious, so let’s try it. Andrew from the office came in, a tall well spoken man who had been incredibly helpful with my request to use the pool, as had Kierann the pool manager. ‘Time to wrap up guys, we’ve got a training session in here soon,’ Andrew said. Thumbs up all round. I better get my skates on and do this thing quickly, otherwise I’m going home depressed, I thought.

I stepped up, wrapping my toes around the poolside ready to give a good lateral push. Deep breaths, come on Dave. Left foot up, lean out with a hard push off the side. The AquaSkipper rose high in the water, probably higher than I’d managed ever before, and I started to bounce, quick flighty movements up and down up and down. I’m bloody moving! Look at this! Then, 7 or 8 metres down I realised the excitement had gotten the better of me and I’d neglected to direct the ‘Skipper. The left side of the pool approached and I disembarked before I got too close. Under the water I screamed with delight. Such a small thing, but I’m ready for a challenge again and I really feel like this could be the next one.

Wayne had another bounce, heading towards the halfway mark and falling off backwards. Ash had a go and almost hit his head on the side of the pool because he didn’t push off at all! My turn again, please don’t let the last one be a one hit wonder. It wasn’t, hard push off, high up again, bounce bounce bounce bouncing free. Over halfway, into the shallow end. And then as the opposite side of the pool came close (I’d forgotten to steer again) I fell off sideways, delighted. Thank god for that, YES!

One last go, this time launching from the shallow end, which by the way was closer than the other end now. Halfway again. Got it. You beauty. We’ll be back next Tuesday, the ‘Skipper and I. See you then.